Parenting.

I guess I need to be careful first off by saying I will preface this post as something that has bothered me for awhile and I am choosing to express my feelings at this point. 

What is so commonly treated as a wrongdoing or going out of the social norm is considered wrong by others. What I'm getting at are people's opinions on motherhood and parenting. 

People claim we may be ruining our little ones if we put a kindle or movie on for them, we feed them the wrong foods, feeding solids too early, not breastfeeding, feeding in public, formula feeding, not cloth diapering. Etc etc etc. 

What exactly is wrong and what is exactly is right? Who in the world knows?! I used to be the woman who said I would never want children and that I wouldn't ever get married. Things changed obviously. I met my amazing husband and we obviously have our daughter Aislyn who is my entire world. I have the privilege to stay home with her and watch her grow. I never had the desire to be a sahm or want to have kids again. But here I am laying on the couch writing as she naps on my chest. 

I came into pregnancy extremely moody and cynical. I had a terrible pregnancy and an even worse birthing experience. I was all about the drugs and would have gladly taken a cesarean after 30+ hours of labor. Judge me if you will but you weren't there experiencing the pain and exhaustion I had to ensure. 

I was also very against breast feeding. I had many reasons to feel the way that I did and I was harshly judged from other mothers for my decisions without them knowing my reasoning. But along with a friend who recently shared her blog post on having kids it's no one's business. I tried really hard after Azy was born to breast feed but things didn't work the way I anticipated. I exclusively pumped for four months and it got to the point where my production was not meeting my daughter's needs. So I ended up giving formula because I was not comfortable with milk banks and using other's milk for my own reasoning which I won't share. My daughter is thriving, healthy, and happy. Isn't that all that matters?

When it comes to feeding my child solids and doing it before six months it comes after consulting my pediatrician and deciding we would attempt them in order to increase her caloric intake. I don't think it's anyone's business when or why I have done what I've done. My parenting is based upon my values and ideologies as a person who is well educated and wants my child to do the absolute best that she can. I don't believe that I have to justify anything to anyone because they are not me and they are not my daughter's parents. 

No one way is right and no one way is wrong in my opinion if your child is happy, healthy, developing, and meeting milestones accordingly. I will not change how I parent or what I do.

 This goes on to how I share my daughter. I post pictures on Facebook for family to see because we live out of state and for some it is the only way they will view my daughter. All the pictures are private to just my friends. Recently people have complained that their newsfeed is blowing up with babies. Get over it. People in their twenties and thirties will have children and choose to share them. Frankly if that offends you get over it. 

Don't preach to others what you think you know about parenting or what news article you might have read that all of a sudden makes you an expert. It doesn't. Be respectful and if you have a problem with that person or what they are doing I'm sorry but it's not your problem. 

I fully respect all women who have children and whether they choose to breastfeed, cloth diaper, formula feed, baby wear, work and do daycare. At the end of the day the ONLY THINGS that matter are the happiness and health of the children and the parents. No one is perfect. No one person will parent exactly the same. Everyone is different. Don't judge others because you never know their circumstances around decisions and you never know why they might make the decisions they do. 

Comments

  1. I am with you all the way!! I wanted to breast feed really bad with both of my kids but my body just does not produce what my kids needed. I had some judgments of something I had no control over and Alan and I have family who live in a different country and we want them to know what is going on so I post quite a few pictures as well. I have a lot of opinions on how to raise kids because that is what I majored in at BYU, Home and Family Living, but I would NEVER criticize how someone else was parenting unless there was harm to the child. I think you are doing a great job and your little girl is adorable!!

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